Bryan's work Christmas Party was last night. Now when alcohol isn't involved you have to invent other ways to bring out the weirdness in the people you work with. At Barney, McKenna & Olmstead, that is achieved with the White Elephant Exchange game. But I'll get to that in a minute.
When you first arrive at the party, you are given a questionaire to fill out. Then you have to find people with the same answers as you and sign your name. You can't have the same person sign for more than 1 answer however, so it forces you to walk around the room and meet people. The first one finished wins a gift card (usually to a restaurant or bookstore). After that game is over we all eat dinner and talk. Then we play a couple more games that usually are made up by one of the partners. This is interesting because you find out who is really competitive and who cheats! And it happens quite a bit! When those games are finished the chairs are moved back and numbers are handed out for the White Elephant Game.
Everyone brings a gift. For each couple you bring one bad White Elephant and one good gift that is under $5.00. They are all bunched in together so you never know what you are going to get. This is where the craziness without alcohol begins. The first person chooses a gift from the pile and opens it. The next person can choose to "steal" the gift from the first person or choose one from the pile. A gift can only be stole 2 times before it is "dead" and the person with it gets to keep it. Two years ago, one gift was chosen by a partner in the law firm. He opened it and found a COW TONGUE. Last year he retaliated by bringing a wild field mouse as a gift. From those two years I learned not to choose a gift that is either on ice or has air holes. There is always a prize for the worst white elephant gift.
But this year really takes the cake. There was a rather large package with a note on it saying "This is the top." One of the receptionists was brave enough to chose the gift. She began to unwrap it and realized that the wrapping paper was a bit wet. She kept going to find a couple of styrofoam ice chests (the flimsy ones from WalMart) stacked on top of each other. A note told her to open the top one where she found a freezer ice bag. Under the ice bag was a bone! She squealed. I looked at it and thought it was a cow rib or something but the man sitting next to Bryan said, "That's my rib bone. I had surgery 2 weeks ago and they had to take my rib out, so I brought it as my white elephant gift." IT WAS A HUMAN RIB!!! I was so grossed out! The second ice chest had some candy in it but I don't really think that made up for the first one being a human rib. The wife of the man who brought the rib actually "stole" it back from the woman who originally opened it, for which I was really glad.
Bryan came up with the strategy of sticking to stealing opened gifts from others so you at least know what you are going to end up with and we went home with the best gifts of any year. I told Bryan that I'm a bit nervous for next year because I don't know what someone can do to top a human rib as a white elephant gift.
Fun times with the law firm!